Critique my ad please?

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Critique my ad please?

Postby cleverpony » Fri Jun 10, 2005 9:57 pm

#ed_op#DIV#ed_cl#Here's a link to the one that's posted on the EC classifieds - so far I think all the versions I've posted on the internet are the same, but I haven't had very much interest. Any suggestions would be greatly appreciated.#ed_op#/DIV#ed_cl##ed_op#DIV#ed_cl# #ed_op#/DIV#ed_cl##ed_op#DIV#ed_cl##ed_op#A href="http://equimarket.equestrianconnection.com/showads.asp?adnumber=44390"#ed_cl#http://equimarket.equestrianconnection.com/showads.asp?adnumber=44390#ed_op#/A#ed_cl##ed_op#/DIV#ed_cl#
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Postby shady222 » Sat Jun 11, 2005 12:04 am

#ed_op#DIV#ed_cl#would someone be able to try another type of riding other than trails? if you said he would be willing to try some dressage, jumping, lessons, western pleasure...lol no idea what other types of things he could do...but if you left him open to a variety of riders, maybe kids horse? then you would have more of a market looking for something like him. #ed_op#/DIV#ed_cl#
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Postby chenders01 » Sat Jun 11, 2005 7:29 am

#ed_op#DIV#ed_cl#Chester sounds like a really nice horse!  Can he do anything else besides trails?  What is his training?  Can he do anything western?  Has he been ridden english?  You're likely to get more interest if he can do ring work as well as trails.  #ed_op#/DIV#ed_cl##ed_op#DIV#ed_cl# #ed_op#/DIV#ed_cl##ed_op#DIV#ed_cl#Also, have you checked out the "Horse Wanted" forums?  On Equiman, I see people looking ALL the time for a horse like Chester.  Here are some ads:#ed_op#/DIV#ed_cl##ed_op#DIV#ed_cl# #ed_op#/DIV#ed_cl##ed_op#DIV#ed_cl##ed_op#A href="http://www.equiman.com/cgi-bin/ubb/Forum17/HTML/001460.html"#ed_cl#http://www.equiman.com/cgi-bin/ubb/Forum17/HTML/001460.html#ed_op#/A#ed_cl##ed_op#/DIV#ed_cl##ed_op#DIV#ed_cl# #ed_op#/DIV#ed_cl##ed_op#DIV#ed_cl##ed_op#A href="http://www.equiman.com/cgi-bin/ubb/Forum17/HTML/001448.html"#ed_cl#http://www.equiman.com/cgi-bin/ubb/Forum17/HTML/001448.html#ed_op#/A#ed_cl##ed_op#/DIV#ed_cl##ed_op#DIV#ed_cl# #ed_op#/DIV#ed_cl##ed_op#DIV#ed_cl##ed_op#A href="http://www.equiman.com/cgi-bin/ubb/Forum17/HTML/001447.html"#ed_cl#http://www.equiman.com/cgi-bin/ubb/Forum17/HTML/001447.html#ed_op#/A#ed_cl##ed_op#/DIV#ed_cl##ed_op#DIV#ed_cl# #ed_op#/DIV#ed_cl##ed_op#DIV#ed_cl##ed_op#A href="http://www.equiman.com/cgi-bin/ubb/Forum17/HTML/001424.html"#ed_cl#http://www.equiman.com/cgi-bin/ubb/Forum17/HTML/001424.html#ed_op#/A#ed_cl##ed_op#/DIV#ed_cl##ed_op#DIV#ed_cl# #ed_op#/DIV#ed_cl##ed_op#DIV#ed_cl# #ed_op#/DIV#ed_cl#
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Postby cleverpony » Sat Jun 11, 2005 5:47 pm

#ed_op#DIV#ed_cl#Thanks for the info guys. The reason that Chester is advertised as a trail horse is because once upon a time he was a schoolie, and now he will tolerate some ring work (once-weekly lessons, lets say - not too much more) he really prefers to be "going somewhere" and by saying trail horse only, I thought I'd be weeding out those who ride daily in a ring and/or an arena (which is an absolute no-go - at least in an outdoor ring he can see stuff). He's not for a total beginner, but an "advanced" beginner would have no problem, if that makes sense - but I'm afraid if I state that then I'll get responses from people who are taking frequent lessons/doing ring frequent ring work. He doesnt get dangerous or anything if he's worked too often in a ring, but he so clearly prefers to be out and about that I was hoping for a home that would facilitate this. Any ideas for somehow suggesting this in the ad, other than "mostly for trails"?#ed_op#/DIV#ed_cl#
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Postby shady222 » Sat Jun 11, 2005 11:52 pm

#ed_op#DIV#ed_cl#hmmm well you could say he can be worked in the ring but he likes change and gets bored easily or mention how he could do lessons and thing but prefers to be doing something or going somewhere...have you tried jumping him? that is a change from flat work and maybe would pique his interest...or cross country its like a trail ride while jumping jumps at fairly fast paces...im not saying you don't know any of this just giving you some ideas. I have to keep things interesting for my mare too, but i can keep her in the ring and keep them interesting at the same time if i am very creative. #ed_op#/DIV#ed_cl#
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Postby goldendryad » Mon Jun 13, 2005 12:54 am

Geez....he would sell out here in a heartbeat! I know tons of pleasure/recreation riders who would love a steady eddy like him.#ed_op#br#ed_cl#
#ed_op#br#ed_cl#
So about your ad:#ed_op#br#ed_cl#
#ed_op#br#ed_cl#
- leave out the "unregistered"....he's a gelding....papers only really matter for performance/breeding...and only to some people#ed_op#br#ed_cl#
#ed_op#br#ed_cl#
- talk about how quiet he is...will he cross water? does he have smothe gates? Anything else special about him?#ed_op#br#ed_cl#
#ed_op#br#ed_cl#
- talk about any abilities he may have. What did he do in the past? Is
he at all cowy? A horse like him would make a great ranch/checking cows
type horse. Does he like to go? Could he do gymkhana, some horses
really love that challenge. Speaking of which, does he go
western/English/both? Does he neck rein? What else can he do? Turn
really fast? Is he OK with kids? Would he be great for a beginner?#ed_op#br#ed_cl#
#ed_op#br#ed_cl#
- maybe he just needs a rider to keep doing new things with him or is a
"one person only" type of horse. I know lots of horses who get
difficult when the get bored. Maybe he needs a rider that will mix
things up for him?#ed_op#br#ed_cl#
#ed_op#br#ed_cl#
- could you change the title....maybe confidence building isn't
working...or is attracting people looking for something else, like a
competition horse that's been there done that? Try and pick something
that catches the eye. "Flashy trail horse" or "great pleasure horse"??
Not like those are great examples, but they might help....#ed_op#br#ed_cl#
#ed_op#br#ed_cl#
- oh, and maybe indicate reason for selling....or??? is he up to date on farrier work and shots?#ed_op#br#ed_cl#
#ed_op#br#ed_cl#
- also, consider if he is truely worth the listed price? Is he worth
more or less? What are other pleasure horses in your area going for?
Where I'm from (SK) not many would pay that much for just a trail horse
unless he could do a bit more like work cows, teach a kid, be used in
4-h?? But that's just where I'm from.#ed_op#br#ed_cl#
#ed_op#br#ed_cl#
Some ideas for you. Take what works and leave the rest. Hope it helps.#ed_op#img src="richedit/smileys//smiley4.gif"#ed_cl#
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Postby xena_n_joss » Wed Jun 22, 2005 12:45 pm

#ed_op#DIV#ed_cl#I would leave out him not being registered as well.... I for one dont really care about papers... If its got it, great, if it doesnt, oh well.... Xena doesnt have any papers and shes just as good a horse as any registered warmblood type. #ed_op#/DIV#ed_cl##ed_op#DIV#ed_cl# #ed_op#/DIV#ed_cl##ed_op#DIV#ed_cl#I would say he "only" trail rides. You can definately mention he was a school horse but has only been used for trails for however long. Some horses who have ring issue can get over it if you figure out the problem. If hes young enough someone could easily do that. #ed_op#/DIV#ed_cl##ed_op#DIV#ed_cl# #ed_op#/DIV#ed_cl##ed_op#DIV#ed_cl#Really I wouldnt restrict him to "just trail"... that should be for the buyer to decide. All you should be doing is be honest. Mabey he just didnt like being a school horse? Who knows mabey with the right rider he could actually do something once they found out his talent?#ed_op#/DIV#ed_cl#
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Postby cleverpony » Thu Jun 23, 2005 8:18 pm

#ed_op#DIV#ed_cl#Hi guys,#ed_op#/DIV#ed_cl##ed_op#DIV#ed_cl#Thanks for the advice. I am only selling him to a home that will use him primarily for trail as that's really what he loves and is the only reason I'm selling him, so I didn't feel comfortable taking that out of the ad. Fortunately he sold this past week to a woman getting back into riding who lives on a large acreage and seems to be a very good match. #ed_op#/DIV#ed_cl##ed_op#DIV#ed_cl#Thanks again all :)#ed_op#/DIV#ed_cl#
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